Being a care giver...

Created Sep 10 2007

Ok, I probably have explained my current situation. I'm just not sure that I have, 'cause I hate the feeling that I'm whining about it. My obligation to others who are in the same predicament means I ought to clarify a few details... First off: I'm a caregiver to my mother, who is 81 and suffers from congestive heart failure, having about 20% function and requires a pacemaker to live. She also suffers from diabetes, has partial loss of function in her digits due to neuropathy, has had cancer, and now suffers from occasional incontinence of the bowels. My older sister, while being supportive, is also trying to live her own life with her husband and their family. let me give you this, to understand the issues I'm dealing with; http://www.parade.com/articles/editions/2007/edition_09-09-2007/Caregivers http://www.strengthforcaring.com/ http://www.caregiving.org/ Every day is a struggle for me to make her comfortable. Happiness, for her, is pretty much out of the question. For one, she's lost any tolerance for discomfort that would allow her the transcendence to being happy. Two, things have been out of hand in my household for a while, and being unable to leave her unattended for any long stretch of time makes it difficult to deal with these issues. Going to work would be a relief, except the latest seagull manager is particularly full of nasty guano that he likes to deposit in the most dramatic manner. I'd add something about "John Henry-ism" and possibly being from an abusive childhood, but that would be pure speculation upon my part.. Putting Mom in a retirement home would probably kill her, as the ability to attend her needs quickly would be reduced, as would the motivation for her to push past depression and do for herself....

Note: My mother passed away in August of 2010